As I age, which is a privilege, birthdays have become an opportunity to reflect on what I’ve learnt and how life continues to shape me. As I’ve just completed another trip around the sun, I wanted to share with you my list of 50 Life Lessons.
Couple of years ago I shared my first list of 50 things I consider important learnings from a busy life that took me to live in five countries, allowed me to pursue several career paths to the fullest, brought me incredible friends from all over the world – and a mindset that I hope will allow me at least another 25 years working on things I am passionate about.
I have made changes to the original list – after all, I’ve been through some character-forming experiences since then. But the essence is the same, and while this list is partly personal to me, hopefully you all will find things you can relate to and perhaps pause for a second and think “hm, yes, she might be onto something here”.
So, without further ado, in celebration of my birthday, please enjoy this list of 50 Life Lessons – learnings from business, leadership and life in general:
1. Be kind. But don’t let them mistake your kindness for weakness.
2. Changing the world, or your life, starts with small steps that add up over time.
3. Understand the need for change and lean into it so you can do it your way. Change is harder if it’s forced upon you.
4. Watch people’s actions, not just their words: integrity is important. Good, strong values will guide you through whatever challenges you face.
5. Opportunities rarely come around exactly when you want them. Grab them when they appear, even if you have to adjust or accelerate other plans.
6. Consistency is key to better habits – and to good leadership. Being consistent with your team will ensure better results for everyone. And a nicer working environment. Don’t underestimate the impact of creating psychological safety as a leader.
7. Look for balance in everything and don’t be afraid to challenge the status quo.
8. Touch the grass, smell the flowers, play with the kids, watch the birds, ride the horse, play with the dog, or the cat. They will keep you grounded.
9. Learn to breathe deeply in times of stress. In for a count of four, hold for four, let out for four. Forest bathing works too.
10. There are no shortcuts to wisdom. You have to gain the experience yourself.
11. Experts do know better. They understand how nuance changes everything. Good experts speak fluent “layman” language while shouty amateurs oversimplify the complex, which can lead to the wrong conclusions.
12. Once you’re over forty, focus on building muscle and on mobility – both key to ageing well and to avoiding becoming frail with brittle bones in our 70s and beyond. Cardio only will serve you less well. Expect to work out till your very old days if you want to stay mobile.
13. Eat lots of plants, with a good balance of protein, carbohydrates and fats. Don’t just follow the nutrition trend of the day; these are often gimmicks. Yes, protein is important. No, you don’t need to eat THAT much if you’re not a bodybuilder. Eat more fibre.
14. Access to knowledge is only the first step – you have to know HOW to apply it in real-life situations.
15. A good umbrella is small, sturdy and flexes with the wind. Sunglasses are essential, whatever the weather.
16. Take the job seriously – not yourself. Even if you are the CEO.
17. Have clear boundaries and don’t be a troll.
18. The right Mindset is everything. A growth mindset can carry you through challenges, regardless of what skills and tools you possess in the beginning.
19. Always be curious. It will take you farther than you could ever imagine.
20. Argan oil does wonders for your hair.
21. Healthspan is just as important as longevity.
22. Ageing is a gift. Embrace every phase, every transition. Keep up with changes in the world and keep building your circle of people – it will keep you young, more so than those 249 supplements they tell you to take.
23. Life really is short – call that person. Move on from what doesn’t serve you. Find what makes you your best self.
24. It doesn’t matter if you are a lark or an owl. Waking up early doesn’t make anyone better. Neither will it make you automatically successful. Hard work will – whether you do it at 5 am or 2 am.
25. Hire people with a good attitude and judgment. Technical skills can always be taught, but changing behaviours is much harder.
26. Listen to feedback but only if it’s informed and impartial, with no agenda. Don’t underestimate how often well-meaning feedback or advice is wrong for your specific situation.
27. Don’t criticise women’s looks. If you’re a woman, don’t hate on your own body either.
28. Cleanse and moisturise your face, religiously, morning and evening, every single day to keep the botox away or just to feel good in your skin.
29. Talk to strangers regularly. Allow your worldview to change for the better.
30. Learn what you need for a job or career, then learn about things that interest you. Then learn again about things that will make you better at your job… Keep repeating.
31. Being able to walk away from toxic situations, deals, workplaces, or people is a form of freedom.
32. Explore – then make up your mind fast.
33. It’s helpful to be able to see through people and their motives, but don’t let it make you jaded.
34. Laugh it off, if possible. If not, walk away or change the circumstances.
35. Not all canned fish are created equal. Some are actually really good. Just ask the Spanish.
36. Reading fiction builds emotional intelligence. It’s science. Ignore the literary snobs – read whatever genre you like.
37. Many non-fiction books should have been an article.
38. The most knowledgeable people are rarely shouty. The loudest don’t always know what they are talking about – but some clever people adapted shouting to cope with the mindless noise.
39. Never stop learning. It keeps you relevant, it keeps you sharp, it keeps you young.
40. It’s not the best idea that wins, but the one best executed.
41. Respect – give it and expect it.
42. There is no one right way to do most everyday things. Let people do their own things their own way.
43. Your culture is not superior.
44. The more effortless something seems, the more effort was involved in its creation, often over many years or even decades. The road to achievement is neither short nor linear.
45. You can’t emulate greatness or achievement by copying the post-achievement behaviour of someone. Don’t idolise lucky people for what they haven’t actually done.
46. Learning should be cylindrical. Re-reading or re-learning something is not a waste of time – it builds on your previous knowledge and gives you depth and a different perspective. Think of progressing from the bottom to the top of a cylinder in a circular fashion, not moving ahead in a straight horizontal line.
47. It is possible to be both thoughtful and action-oriented.
48. Don’t let work become overall more important than your loved ones. Build the family that makes you happy and secure.
49. Listen. No, really LISTEN to what others are saying. Not just the words. Digest the meaning, don’t just focus on shooting back a response.
50. Trying to be a good human is a valid goal. It doesn’t make you weak.
+1. This one life we have is precious. Take a chance. Live it well.
Judit x